Too Many Choices

I feel lucky to only have a mental prison. There’s so many people in physical prisons- incarcerated, hospitalized, refugees… and in poverty. Poverty is the norm, the majority of people face poverty when you think of all of human history and the whole world. There are so many kinds of “real”, inescapable suffering. 

I’ve never had to worry about food or housing, basic necessities. If I were to consider Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, I’ve never had to worry about physiological needs or safety and security. I have in the past struggled a bit with love and belonging in terms of friendships, but I’ve always had my family. This leaves self-esteem and self actualization. I feel like I actually haven’t really taken a close look at Maslow’s hierarchy of needs since I was a kid, and now looking at the triangle as an adult really brings on a new perspective. As a kid growing up with other people who also didn’t have to deal with the 2 bottom levels, I assumed that’s the norm for me and those that I surround myself with. 

The only real prison I live in on a daily basis is my own self-doubt. The limitations I set onto myself. I feel like that’s what causes a lot of guilt in the first place and makes me feel too anxious to start anything. I think to myself… you had all the advantages in the world in front of you, and you’ve only gotten this far? But that’s also just self-sabotaging, because all that mental energy spent on what ifs could be used on actually doing something about it. We all have the key to our own mental prison, and it’s a matter finding the courage and persistence to use it. It’s not a one and done thing, it’s something we must face each and every day.